A accident just happened and people are crowding around the accident area. A journalist, wanting to get this accident, tried to squeeze into the middle but to no avail. Being a smart aleck, he shouted, "I am the son of the victim!"
Instantly, the crowd gave way. Lying in front was a donkey.

since there are jokes in words..
well i shall be the one with jokes in pictures.
hehe.

and guowei is sexeh.

P.S anyone who wanna watch my suona instructor's performance at Esplanade Recital hall this coming sunday 7.30pm, please drop me a message.

tickets are priced at $15 each. So far only the whole of suona group, jinquan and sianlin going :D

Ello people!! Today's joke. Hehe...

A ventriloquist was making a gig using a dummy on his knee. He was making fun of blondes when a blonde stormed towards him and shouted, " How can you stereotype us blondes like this?! Even though our hair colour are different, we are worth the same!!"
The ventriloquist, frightened, stammers an apology but the blonde cut him short and continued, "Stay out of this mister! I'm talking to that guy on your lap!"

LMAO.

More:
What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
Gifted.

No offence. It's in Reader's Digest. =P

-You-Dunno-Who

Today, we will talk about some Physics and on yesterday's newspaper. As you all know, a man while driving drove into a tree and his car was burning. As a result, he burnt to death and he "was converted to chemical energy" due to the fire.
Hot-air balloon. 2 people did not want to jump out of the burning hot-air balloon. As a result, they met the same fate as the guy above. They "were converted to chemical energy" again.
Another car explosion. Same case. More chemical energy. Tsk tsk..."yesterday's newspaper was so depressing". R.I.P to those victims.

-You-Dunno-Who

P.S: Kudos to Mr Terence Yeo. All qoutes were made by him....For more real-time experience, you may find JQ or me or PY.

Good morning all. Let's wish Wenda a happy birthday. Today's joke.

There was an actor who was fired, thus he went around looking for a job. He came upon a zoo, where its star gorilla died. The zoo manager told the actor to don a monkey suit and act as the gorilla so that it can attract people. The actor agreed.
Everyday, the actor did some stunts but as time goes by, lesser and lesser people came to his cage. So, he decided to swing at the lion's cage beside his cage. Each time he swung, the lion misses him. The crowd were in uproar at this act.
Seeing the popularity, the zoo manager decided to raise his salary. However, one fateful day, he fell into the lion's cage! He ran around with the lion chasing him, shouting,"Don't eat me!Help!!!" Quickly, the lion pounced on him and whispered,"Shut up!Do you want us both to get fired?!"

Rofl.

-You-Dunno-Who

Sup all. I'll continue posting jokes here, lest the forum restarts and all my jokes are deleted. =X Here's a story with some morals.

There was a fierce winter storm blowing, and a bird dropped down to the ground, too cold and frozen to fly any longer. It knew its end was near. Suddenly, a bull walked past and shitted on the bird. The bird fell deeper into despair. 'I'm already going to die, do I have to suffer this kind of humiliation before I go?' Suddenly, it realised that the shit was warm, and he was beginning to feel less frozen. Soon, he would be able to fly again. In his joy, he started to sing a happy song. A cat heard the song, dug the bird out of the shit, and ate him up.
1st Moral: The person who lands you in shit may not be your enemy, the person who gets you out of shit may not be your friend.
2nd Moral: When you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut.

Good night.

-You-Dunno-WHo

LATEST NEWS: TMSCO FORUM RESTARTING.

A blind man was taking a plane to Texas. When he sat down, he shouted, "Wow!This seats are big!" The passenger beside him said," This is Texas. Everything is big."
When the blind man entered a bar in Texas, he touched the mug and exclaimed again,"Wow!This mug is big!" The barman said, "This is Texas. Everything is big."
The blind man then wanted to go to the loo, so he asked for directions. "2nd door from the exit."
Thus, the blind man walked but he tripped and missed the 2nd door and went into the 3rd door. Down he fell into the swimming pool. Frightened, he screamed,"DON'T FLUSH!DON'T FLUSH!"

Lol...that's one big toilet bowl!!

-You-Dunno-Who

Edit: Damn, just realised the mistake. It's "everything" not "everywhere". Soz.

i've contacted the SPCA, and i was told to change the Cbox.
Now this Cbox would be fully moderated by none other than a sexeh boy named Guowei.

Thank you and have a dog-free day ahead.

the old Cbox could be found here: http://tmsco.cbox.ws/

-guowei


(btw, anyone know this number? if not, go flood this idiot's sms. 97506033, he has been disturbing some of us. dunno how he got our number. but yeah. tit for tat. tat for tit. go flood him, prank call him/her. i dun give a damn. just give him/her HELL
-Jingquan the other sexy boy *licks lips*)

EDIT: and that it is impersonating me!!! ARGHH __
im gonna tell teacher seriously.
oh please forward me w/e msg it sends u/ur fren. Thank you.
P.S spread that number around yea. Once again its +65 9750 6033.
-guowei

We regret to inform all readers of the blog that a dog has been let loose. It has currently been doing its business, peeing and sh*tting all over the tagboard. Bear with it for a while. It probably got castrated a few days ago. Yea.

Yours Sincerely, The Management.

Here's today's joke. Happy schooldays for this week.

A person was sitting for his maths exam when he was stuck at a question. Thus, he decided to take a peek at the answer of the person sitting beside him. Thinking that he should not let teachers know he copied, he changed the answer from log(x+1) to...timber(x+1)

Enjoy.

-You-Dunno-Who

Today's joke. Happy weekends people.

2 men were lying on their bed in the hospital ward. In 2 weeks, one of the men mustered some strength and pointed to himself and said, "American". The other one then said, "Canadian". Then, both of them collapsed and went back to sleep.

2 weeks later, both of them woke up again. The American pointed to himself and stuttered, " Dave..." The Canadian then said, " Louis". Again, both of them went back to sleep.

2 weeks later again, both of them woke up. Dave said,"Cancer" and then...the Canadian said Saggitauras....

Rofl.

-You-Dunno-Who

Disclaimer: This jokes are not made by me.

er. new forms for omep soon. keep waiting. hoohoo.


[joke removed]

Sorry for any inconvenience caused, but really, if some government agent sees this, or some crazy racial group sees this, we might create a repeat of the racial riots. yeah.

Heres a joke to ponder. No offense whatsoever. Enjoy. :D






not trying to be a wet blanket here, but there has been complaints.

9:41 pm

Here's the joke for today!

3 rats were discussing about their courage.
1st rat: "I once ate a bagful of rat poison but I didn't die!"

2nd rat:"I was once trapped in a mouse trap but I bit my way out."

At this point, the 3rd rat stood up and said, " Bye, I'm off home to harass the cat."

That's all dudes, have fun tomorrow.

-You-Dunno-Who


Disclaimer: Special Thanks to KCobain,Ash.

hey...
updates updates!
we're taking coach to Alor Setar!! hoo yehh!
*prays for Cao Yuan Kuai Che*
lols jk.

and our concert date is confirmed. next year 16th march. Singapore Conference Hall.
yep. thats about all. haha.


Cheers, Jingquan a.k.a (ohW-wonK-uoY)

hahaha.

This is really funny. =D Bear with the length.

Asian guy is having his “SNACK” ( bread and jam) when an American man chuckling chewing gum, sits down next to him. The Asian ignores the American who, nevertheless, starts a conversation.

American: “You Asian folks eat the whole bread??”
Asian (in a bad mood): “Of course.”
American: (after blowing a huge bubble) “We don’t. In the States, we only eat what’s inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and export them to Asia.”

The American has a smirk on his face. The Asian listens in silence.

The American persists: “D'ya eat fruits with their skins?”
Asian : “Of Course.”
American: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling). “We don’t. In the States we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and export them to Asia .”

The Asian ( pissed off) then asks: “Do you have sex in America?”
American: “Why of course we do”, the American says with a big smirk.
Asian : And what do you do with the condoms once you’ve used them?”
American: “We throw them away, of course.”
Asian : “We don’t. In Asia, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and export them to America.

Pwnt.
P.S: Let's welcome Percussion's new junior..........................

-You-Dunno-Who (kindly edited by ohW-wonK-uoY)

Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.

Hello all...Here are more questions!

1. How many letters are there in the alphabet?
11
2. How many sides does have a circle have?
2 sides, outside and inside.
3. What is at the end of everthing?
G
4.If it takes 5 people 1 day to dig up a field, how long does it take 10 people?
No time at all.

-You-Dunno-Who

Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.

Hello. A good job well done to those who sold things at CO booth today.

A lawyer was at the gate to enter heaven when St. Peter asked him what he have done to get into heaven.
Lawyer: "Err...3 weeks ago, i gave a quarter to a beggar!"
St. Peter:"Eh...??"
Lawyer:"Wait wait! 3 years ago i gave a quarter to another beggar!!"St. Peter then turns to Gabriel and ask him what he should do.
Gabriel:"Let's give him back his 50c and send him to hell."

Poor lawyer.

-You-Dunno-Who

Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.

This is a conversation between someone and AT&T, a phone company. The "me" is not me. Enjoy...

Me: Hello
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T....
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T....
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes. This is AT&T....
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: YES! This is AT&T. May I speak to Mr. Jack please?
Me: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
Me: OK, hold on. (At this point, I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, she was still waiting. )
Me: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Jack?
Me: May I ask who is calling please?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T....
Me: Is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T....
Me: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, is this Mr. Jack?
Me: Yes, is this AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, sir.
Me: The phone company?
AT&T: Yes, sir.
Me: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, sir, we are a phone company.
Me: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren't selling phones today, Mr. Jack.
Me: Well, whatever it is, I'm really not interested, but thanks for calling. (When you are not interested in something, I don't think you can express yourself any plainer than by saying "I'm really not interested", but this lady was persistent. )
AT&T: Mr. Jack, we would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. (Now, I am sure she meant she was offering a "rate" of 10 cents a minute, but she at no time used the word "rate". I could clearly see that it was time to whip out the trusty old calculator and do a little ciphering. )
Me: Now, that's 10 cents a minute 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes, sir, that's right! 24 hours a day! Me: 7 days a week?
AT&T: That's right.
Me: 365 days a year?
AT&T: Yes, sir.
Me: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!! That's amazing!!
AT&T: We think so!
Me: That's quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes, sir, it's amazing how it adds up.
Me: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one at the end of the year for the full $52,560? If you send an annual check, can I get a cash advance?
AT&T: Excuse me?
Me: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
Me: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1,008 per week and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you will be making payment.
AT&T: Oh no, sir, I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10 cents a minute.
Me: Wait a minute here! Didn't you say you'd give me 10 cents a minute? Are you sure this is AT&T?
AT&T: Well, yes, this is AT&T, sir, but....
Me: But nothing! How do you figure that by saying that you'll give me 10 cents a minute that I'll give you 10 cents a minute? Is this some kind of suliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read about things like this in the Enquirer, you know. Don't use your alien brainwashing techniques on me.
AT&T: No, sir, we are offering 10 cents a minute for....
Me: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please?!?
AT&T: Sir, I don't think that is necessary.
Me: Sure! You say that now! What happens later?
AT&T: What?
Me: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes, Mr. Jack. Please hold. (So, now AT&T has me on hold, and my supper is getting cold. I begin to eat while I'm waiting for a supervisor. After a wait of a few minutes and while I have a mouth full of food....... )
Supervisor: Mr. Jack?
Me: Yeth?
Supervisor: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10 cents a minute program.
Me: Id thish Ath Teeth & Teeth? (Is this AT&T)
Supervisor: Yes, sir, it sure is. (I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to suppress my laughter, and I had to be careful not to produce a snort. )
Me: No, actually I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so that I could sign up for the plan.
Supervisor: OK, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who was helping you.
Me: Thank you. (I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I needed to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite voice at the other end of the phone. )
AT&T: Hello, Mr. Jack. I understand that you are interested in signing up for our plan?
Me: Do you have that friends and family thing because you can never have enough friends and I'm an only child and I'd really like to have a little brother.........
AT&T: (click)

It's a bit long...but...=P

-You-Know-Who( don't copy me...)


Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.

Here are some wonderful anagrams to amaze your mind...Enjoy.

Dormitory => Dirty Room
Desperation => A Rope Ends It
The Morse Code => Here Come Dots
Slot Machines => Cash Lost in 'em
Animosity => Is No Amity
Snooze Alarms => Alas! No More Z's
Alec Guinness => Genuine Class
Semolina => Is No Meal
The Public Art Galleries => Large Picture Halls, I Bet
A Decimal Point => I'm a Dot in Place
The Earthquakes => That Queer Shake
Eleven plus two => Twelve plus one
Contradiction => Accord not in it

Those who want the video link, PM me. Sit back and relax. =P
==You-Know-Who


[Edited by ohW-wonK-uoY]

Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.

More teasers! =)

1. Eskimos are very good hunters, but they don't hunt penguins. Why?
They live at 2 diff poles.

2. If you take 2 apples out of 3 apples, what do you have?
2 apples.

3. What doesn't exist but has a name?
Nothing.

4.On the way to a water hole a zebra met 6 giraffes. Each giraffe had 3 monkeys hanging from its neck.Each monkey had 2 birds on its tail.How many animals were going to the water hole?
1. Only the zebra is going to the water hole.

Back to jokes...
A young man asked an old rich man how he got rich. Old man: "It was 1945...I had a apple. I shined it and at 5pm I sold it for 90c. The next day, I bought 2 apples and at 5 pm i sold each for 90c. This continues for several months....until..."

"My wife's father died and left us 2mil dollars."

Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.

Here are some questions to waste your brain juice.

1. 2 fathers and 2 sons went duck shooting. Each of them shot one duck. However, there are only 3 dead ducks. Why?
Grandfather, father, son.

2. Every single person died in a aircrash. However, 2 person survived. Why?
They are married.

3. What has no beginning, no ending and nothing in the middle?
Circle/ doughnut.

4. You are in a island surrounded by water. There are a tractor and wagon making hay rides every day. You wonder how the tractor got onto the island. Thus, you ask the villagers on the island. They say its not transported by air nor sea and its not build on the island itself. There are no bridges connecting to the mainland as well. How did the tractor got to the island?
During winter, the lake freezes, and the tractor moves across the frozen lake.

-You-Know-Who


Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.

Here's some food for thought. For English pros. Read this. Yeh! :D

Enjoy.

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese? One index, two indices? Is cheese the plural of choose?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?
When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.
When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.

-You-Know-Who

(ever-so-kindly-edited-by-jingquan) :]

Disclaimer: Special thanks to KCobain, Ash.